Looks like you guys liked the Garofalo Onion-type thing. Well, not to keep biting they style, but I heard somewhere that every Onion staff member has to come up with 25 possible headlines every week, and I thought I'd try it. I only came up with 10, but that's just in one afternoon so leave me alone:
Ja Rule Flatly Rejects Demands To Halt Fronting Campaign
Aaron Brown To Finish Thought
Area Boy Touched On Boy Area
Natalie Maines: "We're More Popular Than Mohammed Now"
Kim Jong-il Thinks He's People
Bob Newhart Anticipates Call From Lorne Michaels, Practices New Zealand Accent [Insert picture of Peter Arnett]
Another Emaciated Blonde Finds Self Trapped In Dance Sequence With Christina Applegate
Lenny Kravitz Fails To, Rocks Vote
John Gibson Vainly Represses Thirst For Human Blood
Class Of '87 Starting To Feel It
Update: Heh heh heh...