March 31, 2003

Looks like you guys liked the Garofalo Onion-type thing. Well, not to keep biting they style, but I heard somewhere that every Onion staff member has to come up with 25 possible headlines every week, and I thought I'd try it. I only came up with 10, but that's just in one afternoon so leave me alone:

Ja Rule Flatly Rejects Demands To Halt Fronting Campaign

Aaron Brown To Finish Thought

Area Boy Touched On Boy Area

Natalie Maines: "We're More Popular Than Mohammed Now"

Kim Jong-il Thinks He's People

Bob Newhart Anticipates Call From Lorne Michaels, Practices New Zealand Accent [Insert picture of Peter Arnett]

Another Emaciated Blonde Finds Self Trapped In Dance Sequence With Christina Applegate

Lenny Kravitz Fails To, Rocks Vote

John Gibson Vainly Represses Thirst For Human Blood

Class Of '87 Starting To Feel It

Update: Heh heh heh...

Posted by Jim Treacher at March 31, 2003 05:06 PM