Ever since he played the Scarecrow in The Wiz, Mike has had to settle for being second best. That ends today!
(Sung to the tune of "If I Only Had a Brain")
If a dev'lish prosecutor
And nerds at their computers
Are causin' you some pain
Just think back to days so jolly
Cozy spoonin' with Macaulay
When you sorta had a brain
On your habits they've been dwellin'
Your records ain't been sellin'
You're not the one to blame
You could teach 'em 'bout the Jew shit
That's kept you from movin' units
If you only had a brain
Oh, you could tell 'em how
You grew into your nose
How the kiddies share your bed in all their clothes
With almost no fellatios
Though they call you weird and creepy
No need for feelin' weepy
As things go down the drain
If it's prison where you're goin'
Think of Webster as you're blowin'
Out that thing you call a brain