October 29, 2004

My vitally important Bin Laden theory that you want to know about

I think that tape was shot in the secret underground prison in Montana where they're holding him. The only thing I can't figure out is why they cut the part at the end where Bush runs up and grabs Osama by the shoulder and yells, "Book 'im, John-o!" And then Ashcroft comes out in a black thong and pasties and the music is like "wakka-chikka wakka-chikka wakka-chikka" and they all start doing it. Why aren't they releasing that? Don't the people have a right to the TRUTH???

Posted by Jim Treacher at October 29, 2004 03:28 PM
Comments

Because Karl Rove spilled grape juice all over the only copy.

Posted by: Emily at October 29, 2004 04:13 PM

Then they put panties on his head. Man, it was beautiful...

(By the way, it's "wokka chikka wokka wokka. Spell it right!)

Posted by: Andrea Harris at October 29, 2004 05:16 PM

The Montana explanation makes a lot of sense. The only hole in it is the fact there are no Jews in Montana.
So I'll keep the structure of the Treacher theory, but stipulate it's in Larchmont, NY.
Because absolutely none of this is happening without the Jews.

Posted by: rod at October 29, 2004 08:09 PM

halp need as halp

Is Puce mixed up in this, too?

Posted by: Curtis at October 30, 2004 01:20 PM

If it involves Ashcroft in a thong, we can't handle the truth. I could be okay with the pasties as long as he doesn't do that "Let the Eagle Soar" thing as he twirls them.

Posted by: jon at October 31, 2004 01:25 PM

IS PUCE HAS IN DORSE

Posted by: loaf at November 1, 2004 04:22 AM

Ashcroft in a thong and pasties? G Dubya having gay sex? With OBL? I'm glad they kapt that from me. After seeing that I would have to tear my eyes out.

Posted by: Shaggydave at November 1, 2004 05:52 AM