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Tonight on "24": Jack Bauer must drink 9 shots of Maker's Mark by 6 PM or the president will die. http://tinyurl.com/c9tdn6
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Maybe we should send Rick Santelli to Gitmo. That would get Obama on his side.
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Sounds like Jindal bombed, but at least it'll give Biden a good excuse for some funny 7/11 gags. 9:43 PM Feb 24th from web (Date and time given so I'm not accused of ripping off Limbaugh)
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It's weird that Helen Thomas could be racist against people from India, considering she used to date Mahatma Ghandi.
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Just talked to Helen Thomas. She was like, "Would Jindal try to put up a teepee on the White House lawn?" Didn't have the heart to tell her.
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What would have a higher score: Stevie Wonder and Stephen Hawking playing soccer, or Helen Thomas and Joe Biden playing Scrabble?
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Hey, when's Slate.com (that's the website number) going to start a "Bidenisms" column? Also, "Internets" = LOL, calling Iowa "Ottawa" = Shhh
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Or was it calling Ottawa "Iowa"? I don't know, those white folks all look the same to me.
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Almost 90% of home foreclosures are happening in CA, FL, NV, and AZ. Break out your checkbooks, you other 53 states! http://is.gd/kYZU
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Biden haiku: "Stimulus package"/That's your mom's nickname for it/(Don't touch the hair, babe)
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They'd better not impose the Fairness Doctrine on Twitter. Rebuttal: Twitter is unfair and should be subject to some sort of doctrine.
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Remember when Kirk, Spock, and Bones started aging really fast? I liked that one. http://is.gd/l1sK BTW, have you seen Obama lately?
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"Anybody got a dirty fish tank?" http://is.gd/l1Ug
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The new voice of black America: http://is.gd/l7Ny
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Garofaloku: Listen up, black folks/Failure to think like I do/Is just self-loathing
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Note to Andrew Sullivan: Hurricanes have human names, but not human birth certificates. Happy hunting anyway.
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Another Kanye West Storytellers outtake: "Hitler had some good ideas, y'all. And them outfits was TIGHT." http://is.gd/laLz
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It would suck to be twins in the Colonial fleet. "You dirty Cylon!" Leave me alone, dude.
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What, you think you can do better? Go ahead.
Posted by Jim Treacher at March 1, 2009 12:33 PM