March 17, 2009

Twitter: A great new way to put off doing your taxes

If you could reconstruct your own body, atom by atom, why would you still be hung like a popcorn kernel? Sorry, Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons.

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"Do you know of anyone whose opinion of Obama is higher now than when he was elected or inaugurated?" Just one: Obama. http://tr.im/hoFR

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In the first draft, Ozymandias tricked Dr. Manhattan into destroying NYC by following him down the street and yelling, "Quick, turn around!"

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When Obama meets Queen Elizabeth, she "won't be getting any DVDs." Which means he still has some VHS tapes lying around. http://tr.im/hp6B

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What's the big deal about Obama doing the Tonight Show? Don't you remember all those great appearances by President Rickles?

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"I'm just a bill, yes, I'm only a bill. If I don't get passed, the Earth will be killed!" http://tr.im/hrmn

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GIBBS: Gelatinous Imbecile Babbles Barackian Shinola

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Happy Irish National Religious Holiday Transformed Into Lurid Global Drinking Binge! Here is a recycled cartoon. http://tr.im/hsT3

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And yet *I* get in trouble for calling the guy a cold fish. http://tr.im/hsYG

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Tapper vs. Gibbs is a deadly game of cat and mouse, assuming the cat is a puma and the mouse has irreparable brain damage. http://tr.im/ht7u

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When you talk about something Limbaugh or O'Reilly said, it's part of a right-wing conspiracy. JournoList? Oh, that's just a coffee klatch.

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JournoList participants include Matthew Yglesias and Ezra Klein. No word yet on the rest of Jim Henson's Pundit Babies.

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I'm behind Jack Cafferty('s car) all the way (because his front bumper tends to hit things after he's had a few) on this: http://tr.im/htJy

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One way to win people over: Don't make this face every time you appear in public. http://tr.im/htOv Also, pay your damn taxes, deadbeat.

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Geithner just keeps finding checkboxes he forgot to click in TurboCompetence. http://tr.im/htRG

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After a certain age, you owe it to yourself and everyone around you to rethink your commitment to nudism.

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Ezra Klein's defense of JournoList is like defending Rahm's daily conference calls by saying, "But EVERYBODY uses phones!" http://tr.im/huoJ

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"Ultimate Predator" fossil found? http://tr.im/huql I didn't even know Scott Ritter was dead.

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If you know what "Frozen Donkey Wheel" means, submit your nickname for THIS year's cliffhanger at http://tr.im/hu2W. Mine is "LOL, Suckers!"

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Sci-Fi Channel = SyFy. Food Network = YumYum. Comedy Central = LOLZ. Discovery Channel = Hey! Arts & Entertainment = Neither. MSNBC = ZZZ.

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I am! In a world! Of Twit!

Posted by Jim Treacher at March 17, 2009 08:27 PM