At this very moment in an alternate reality, my nerdy little doppelganger just flipped on TCM to watch the newly restored and remastered 1946 Batman, written and directed by Orson Welles and starring Gregory Peck as Bats, Basil Rathbone as the Joker, James Cagney as the Riddler, George Raft as Two-Face, and Marlene Dietrich as Catwoman. Sounds nuts, right? It almost happened. Apparently the main reason it didn't was that Welles wanted to squeeze into the Bat-tights himself, but the studio wanted Peck. So Welles got pissed off and did The Lady from Shanghai instead, gained several pounds a year for the next few decades, and became a punchline. But hey, the wino propellant and frozen peas weren't just going to sell themselves.
Cagney would have made a better Two-Face than Riddler, don't you think? Can't you just see him flipping that coin?
(Or it could be a hoax. Probably a hoax, come to think of it...)
Update: Yep. Reel me in. Ah well. Fun to think about, anyway.
MoxiePop has a theory about my old buddy "Jimmy." Is she right? You make the call.
Daniel Frank passes along Joe Rogan's thoughts about Denis Leary stealing bits from the late Bill Hicks. I'm no fan of Rogan, but it's about time somebody at his approximate level of fame said something about it. I still can't believe there wasn't a single Hicks reference in that Comedy Central Roast. But then, it was produced by Leary's production company...
They pronounce it "guyest" down there, right?
A Sorkinless West Wing is fine by me if it means that at no point in an episode do I cry out in despair, "What the Christ are these people talking about?!?" So far this season they're 1 for 1.
I'm not buying the "Goodman's character is a stand-in for Bush" theory, either. For one thing, this guy definitely knows his right from his left.
Blabbity-blah. Fill in your own half-baked opinions here: _________________________________________________
Speaking of dorky superheroes, check out this absolutely insane cover for JLA/Avengers #3. It's the third issue of a comic book where a bunch of long-underwear types from one company (JLA) meet a lot of tights-wearing mesomorphs from another company (Avengers). Stop shoving my head down the toilet and listen. We dweebs have been waiting for this matchup since it was first announced, back when Three's Company was still on ABC, so it's more important than ever. Batman is totally gonna kick Captain America's star-spangled fanny. Then we'll see who the real moron is, won't we, Chuck Kellerman from 4th period Phys Ed? Won't we?
It doesn't surprise me that Suzanne Somers still thinks Three's Company was all about her. It does kind of surprise me that she thinks John Ritter's death is all about her. Well, no, I guess it doesn't.
When did Perry Farrell turn into Jerri Blank?
I still say the new bad guys on Star Trek: Franchise should be called not the Xindi, but the Xlam. (Say it out loud. Or don't.)
Stomping stalkers is so fun, doo-dah, doo-dah. Creepy shitheads on the run, all the doo-dah day.
Ken Layne's studio diary is really cool. I keep meaning to do a really professional-sounding review of his Analog Bootlegs CD, but I'm no music critic. Although I do remember once describing his singing voice as "Mick Jagger in the early stages of hypothermia." In a good way. Anyhow, can't wait to hear The Corvids.
There are a bunch of new episodes at Channel101.com, but I can't seem to view any of them. I want to see what happens on Computerman and Time Belt, but they won't let me. They won't let me.
In the increasingly likely event that you have not read Rolling Stone since you got (or lost) your first no-nametag job, Sean Collins explains why there is no reason to start now:
Why I flipped through the magazine, and consequently stumbled across an article emblematic of the kind of hard-hitting political analysis that won Jann Wenner his many Pulitzers in which it is alleged that computerized voting systems are a big plot by the Bush puppet masters to steal ("more") elections, is quite frankly as much a mystery to me as I'm sure it is to you, but I've entered therapy and I'm trying to work these things out. (Next session will be devoted to understanding why I looked at an article about how the U.S. military is poisoning, uh, the U.S. military with depleted uranium. There's even some pictures of Iraqi kids with leukemia! It must be true! BUSH LIED!!!! Also, Mick Jagger's solo album is a four-star tour de force.)
John Ritter, R.I.P. I'll just go ahead and say it, because I think it's what he would have wanted: Come and knock on Heaven's door, my friend.
And Johnny Cash too. Damn, man. Well, you know that right now he has just one thing to say to the Ferryman...
I need to raise $13,456.50 immediately.
Speaking of begging for scraps, Chris Onstad has been reduced to my level (scroll down past the cartoon, on the left). Except he's actually providing a service, so help the guy out. Also, check out the item on the right, about the fellow who wrote and directed Cabin Fever, in theaters
nowtomorrow. Turns out he's a huge Achewood fan! Come on, Hollywood.
In other news, Pink Moxie has been having a rough week.
Heck, at this point I'm just glad to see I still have 53 readers left.
So what else has been going on?
Well, I guess I should link to this contest, considering I'm currently in third place. Kind of silly, but I suppose it's all in good fun.
Pros? Cons? Questions? Er... comments?
Update: Thanks for the feedback! I'll continue to think about considering the idea, etc.
Yeah, yeah, everybody's sick of "Queer Eye" jokes already. But Tony Millionaire's take is as fresh as if the show premiered yesterday, instead of however many centuries ago it seems like now.
This week's Acid Keg is a page from Steve Hogan's sketchbook. I don't know much about the cartooning process, but I think his pencils look even better than the finished comic. And I like the finished comic! Steve's got kind of a Kyle Baker thing going on, if you know who Kyle Baker is. If you don't, go here.
Also, see that "VOTE! TOP WEBCOMICS" button to the left of the strip? Go ahead and click on that to vote for Acid Keg. As Steve puts it, "I've finally made it into the main page, but I have many FINAL FANTASY sprite comics to fend off." (He's also gaining on a strip called Angel Moxie. A cartoon calling itself Moxie? It's an impostor, be warned. What's that saying about imitation being the sincerest form of flattery? Just kidding.)
Oh yeah, and Steve's started up his blog again.
If anybody wants me to forward them this e-mail, which I received from firstname.lastname@example.org, I'd be glad to. Apparently somebody purporting to be Melissa is now claiming she never e-mailed me. It would be the first time I've heard of somebody's e-mail address being forged for the purpose of making a polite apology, but I guess it's possible. It's not as easy as plugging somebody else's name and e-mail address into a blog's comments, of course...